So my new page is lots of fun and it does cool things, but one thing it doesn't allow is comments from anyone who doesn't have an account. And I don't think I like taht avery much, so I am going to check in here once and a while as well.
Things have been going well with the weight loss...have lost for the last 5 weeks...although sometiems pretty small amounts. But hey, a loss is a loss, and I will take it with a smile on ;)
I am also trying to get in the swing of things as far as planning my wedding goes. It is tricky to do from half way across the country, and I am havinga really tough time with the most important decision...Location. I knwo I am having it in teh Saint John area, but I can't figure out where to have the actual wedding. My futuer hubby is not at all keen in getting married in a church for personal reasons, and I respect that...but it really limits my choices. I would LOVE to get married outside, but I just can't handle the stress of weather screwing everything up (May can be rainy, May can be sunny...you never know)...and well I am stumped. So I am asking all you fellow NBers out there to help me with this...do you have any ideas on a great wedding location? A place that could host both the wedding and reception is ideal...so all my out of town guests don't have to get crazy lost in crazy SJ. HELP!!!
March 22, 2006
February 21, 2006
New Blog Address
I am pretty bored with this blog, it can't do a lot of the fun things I would like to add (or I should say I can't figure out how to do them) and I found a new place that I really love. So check out http://chubbycanadian.extrapounds.com for my new home for the time being. Once I reach goal I may come back here ;)
See you there :)
See you there :)
February 15, 2006
Just Checkin in
I did really well watching what I put into my mouth for most of last week, but as usual the weekend kicked my ass... I decided that I would make some carrot muffins with cream cheese icing (low fat carrot cake, low fat cream cheese), and it was so good. I made 18 muffins, and between Josh and me they were gone by the end of the weekend. (To my credit Josh had more than I did). This combined with a Pizza/garlic bread night, and a foot long subway sub, provided for a nice gain of almost 2 pounds this week (BLAH!!!).
For those of you who are counting, or who have lost count more like it, I am now at 205 pounds (I hate saying that)...which is a 39 pound loss from last year...February 1st, 2006, when I started this whole weightloss journey. It also is the same weight I was at in July! This is right, in 7 months I have lost, gained, and lost and gained the same 5 pounds about 7 times! This is really starting to wear me out...it is like my body knows how badly I would love to be under 200 pounds for once in my adult life! aaarrrggggg...so frustrating...
BUT the good news is that I know exactly why I am not losing...bad news is for some reason I keep sabotaging myself. I will have one week where I will do what I need to do (and I will lose a few pounds) then a week where I somehow forget everything I have learned in the last year (and I gain a few pounds).
I am not trying to be all boohoo Carolyn, feel bad for me, not at all. I am trying to make myself accountable for the bad choices I repeatedly make, and I think that confessing this out loud (or on the internet) is what I need. I can sit here and say it to myself over and over, but until I actually put it out there, I don't think I can actually do anything about it.
So what I have to do is start from the beginning...all over again. I need to establish why I am doing this, what my goals are, why I want to reach those goals, and how I am going to get there! Sorry to you all who thought this would be an exciting post ;)
Why I am doing this:
1. To be healthy, cause my family is a walking medical reference, and I don't want to be a part of that!
2. To be comfortable with me. I hate the feeling you have as a chubby girl in today's world; it is not pleasant at all. I just want to feel good about who I am.
What my goals are:
I would like to lose 5 pounds a month. If I do that, then in 1 year I will be at my goal weight of 144 pounds.
How I am going to get there:
1. JOURNALING! I need to write down every bit of food that goes into my mouth. To some this seems extreme, to me it is the only way I am accountable for what I am eating. No days off from journaling, and no excuses to go over my daily points allowance (including flex and activity points of course)
2. EXERCISE: I am committing to 5 days of exercise a week. All of these days will involve cardio training of at least 30 minutes, and 3 times a week I will do strength training. NO EXCUSES!
3. No TV until 8:00pm during the week: Seems simple...but it is not. TV is what I use for relaxation, and I need to change that. Once and a while it is an okay thing to do, watch a good show here and there, and I can not cut it out completely just yet, but I am going to limit myself. this is in hopes of becoming a little more active.
So there, hopefully this "plan" will help drive me in the proper direction. It is down on "paper", and I can look back at it when I need to.
Now I am going to reread all of my old posts, to see if I can remember how great it feels to be on the "losing" path!
For those of you who are counting, or who have lost count more like it, I am now at 205 pounds (I hate saying that)...which is a 39 pound loss from last year...February 1st, 2006, when I started this whole weightloss journey. It also is the same weight I was at in July! This is right, in 7 months I have lost, gained, and lost and gained the same 5 pounds about 7 times! This is really starting to wear me out...it is like my body knows how badly I would love to be under 200 pounds for once in my adult life! aaarrrggggg...so frustrating...
BUT the good news is that I know exactly why I am not losing...bad news is for some reason I keep sabotaging myself. I will have one week where I will do what I need to do (and I will lose a few pounds) then a week where I somehow forget everything I have learned in the last year (and I gain a few pounds).
I am not trying to be all boohoo Carolyn, feel bad for me, not at all. I am trying to make myself accountable for the bad choices I repeatedly make, and I think that confessing this out loud (or on the internet) is what I need. I can sit here and say it to myself over and over, but until I actually put it out there, I don't think I can actually do anything about it.
So what I have to do is start from the beginning...all over again. I need to establish why I am doing this, what my goals are, why I want to reach those goals, and how I am going to get there! Sorry to you all who thought this would be an exciting post ;)
Why I am doing this:
1. To be healthy, cause my family is a walking medical reference, and I don't want to be a part of that!
2. To be comfortable with me. I hate the feeling you have as a chubby girl in today's world; it is not pleasant at all. I just want to feel good about who I am.
What my goals are:
I would like to lose 5 pounds a month. If I do that, then in 1 year I will be at my goal weight of 144 pounds.
How I am going to get there:
1. JOURNALING! I need to write down every bit of food that goes into my mouth. To some this seems extreme, to me it is the only way I am accountable for what I am eating. No days off from journaling, and no excuses to go over my daily points allowance (including flex and activity points of course)
2. EXERCISE: I am committing to 5 days of exercise a week. All of these days will involve cardio training of at least 30 minutes, and 3 times a week I will do strength training. NO EXCUSES!
3. No TV until 8:00pm during the week: Seems simple...but it is not. TV is what I use for relaxation, and I need to change that. Once and a while it is an okay thing to do, watch a good show here and there, and I can not cut it out completely just yet, but I am going to limit myself. this is in hopes of becoming a little more active.
So there, hopefully this "plan" will help drive me in the proper direction. It is down on "paper", and I can look back at it when I need to.
Now I am going to reread all of my old posts, to see if I can remember how great it feels to be on the "losing" path!
February 08, 2006
Wedding Dresses
It was brought to my attention yesterday that I have only posted once since Christmas...I am getting pretty slack. Especially since this is one of the main resources I was using at one point to help me monitor my progress in this oh so fun journey of weightloss. This, combined with my weight watchers meeting last night pointed me to the number one reason why I haven't been as successful in these past few months as I was in teh beginning...ACCOUNTABILITY!
So I am hoping to atleast post here once a week...once a day is a bitmuch since I had been posting once a month for a while. Eventually it would be nice to get myself up to a once a day post, but don't hold your breath (all 3 people who read this) just yet.
So what has been happening in my life you ask...well I just got back from visiting my best friend Heather in Grande Cache Alberta (Don't feel bad if you have no idea where that is, I didn't either). Talk about a beautiful part of the country...I had never seen mountains before, and they were in her backyard. I loved it there! And to top it off, she is training for what is called the Death Race (she is in amazing shape!) and went for a run pretty much every day we were there. I didn't want her to feel bad for leaving me alone, so I went with her...that is right, I ran most of the days I was on vacation. And not just a little bit either. I mean I didn't get up to her 6 miles a day...but I was running almost 4 (3.8)...which is over 6 kilometers. It felt fantastic to do that first thing in the morning!
Oh and we went to the West Edmonton Mall...Holy Huge! And Heather decides that I should try on some wedding dresses. I said taht I am not even near ther weight I want to be for the wedding (it is over a year away) and that it will just discourage me to see how far away I am from my goals, and she said she wouldn't take no for an answer (she is really hard to say no to in the first place). So off we went to the "bridal boutique" section of the mall. The first store we went to was really prissy and wouldn't let us in without an appointment (plus they were snobby!) so I said lets just forget it for now, but I was convinced to go to anotehr store. The girls at this store were SO NICE, and they looked at me, grabbed two dresses and put me in a changing room...they said don't look at the size, just try the darn things on.
So I slipped into the first one, walked out and saw the look on Heather (and Vanessa who was also hanging out with us at the mall...Thanks Vee!!) and thought...what, is taht a bad look or a good look? Then I got up on the little stand thing adn looked in teh mirror and my jaw literally dropped. HOLY CRAP! I actually looked fab-u-lous in the dress...and I am still a big girl...and I wanted to cry just knowing that I would look great on my wedding even if I didn't get down to 145 pounds like I want to be (although I am still going to be trying mighty hard). So then I try the next dress on, and this time, when I looked in the mirror, there was no "felt like crying", I actually teared up. And so did Heather...and I am almost positive that I have found my dress! Then they go and put a veil and tiara on me, and I didn't wantto move from in front of that mirror. I know now why people pay so much for wedding dresses, they are miracle workers! They take any flaw you have and hide it, and they enhance all your positive attributes! it made my vacation so fabulous, and I haven't been able to stop weding planning since! And to top it off, the dress was 2 sizes smaller than I wore in Heather's wedding in September, and it is made my the same designer, and it was still a bit big. Ahhh so Fabulous!
On another note (kind of back to where I started on in this post) I need to journal what I eat every day...this is the key for me, and I need to get in my exercise, which usually isn't a problem, if I want to be successful. To end on a fabulous quote that I read at the gym in Grande Cache....
WITHOUT A STRUGGLE THERE IS NO PROGRESS
So I am hoping to atleast post here once a week...once a day is a bitmuch since I had been posting once a month for a while. Eventually it would be nice to get myself up to a once a day post, but don't hold your breath (all 3 people who read this) just yet.
So what has been happening in my life you ask...well I just got back from visiting my best friend Heather in Grande Cache Alberta (Don't feel bad if you have no idea where that is, I didn't either). Talk about a beautiful part of the country...I had never seen mountains before, and they were in her backyard. I loved it there! And to top it off, she is training for what is called the Death Race (she is in amazing shape!) and went for a run pretty much every day we were there. I didn't want her to feel bad for leaving me alone, so I went with her...that is right, I ran most of the days I was on vacation. And not just a little bit either. I mean I didn't get up to her 6 miles a day...but I was running almost 4 (3.8)...which is over 6 kilometers. It felt fantastic to do that first thing in the morning!
Oh and we went to the West Edmonton Mall...Holy Huge! And Heather decides that I should try on some wedding dresses. I said taht I am not even near ther weight I want to be for the wedding (it is over a year away) and that it will just discourage me to see how far away I am from my goals, and she said she wouldn't take no for an answer (she is really hard to say no to in the first place). So off we went to the "bridal boutique" section of the mall. The first store we went to was really prissy and wouldn't let us in without an appointment (plus they were snobby!) so I said lets just forget it for now, but I was convinced to go to anotehr store. The girls at this store were SO NICE, and they looked at me, grabbed two dresses and put me in a changing room...they said don't look at the size, just try the darn things on.
So I slipped into the first one, walked out and saw the look on Heather (and Vanessa who was also hanging out with us at the mall...Thanks Vee!!) and thought...what, is taht a bad look or a good look? Then I got up on the little stand thing adn looked in teh mirror and my jaw literally dropped. HOLY CRAP! I actually looked fab-u-lous in the dress...and I am still a big girl...and I wanted to cry just knowing that I would look great on my wedding even if I didn't get down to 145 pounds like I want to be (although I am still going to be trying mighty hard). So then I try the next dress on, and this time, when I looked in the mirror, there was no "felt like crying", I actually teared up. And so did Heather...and I am almost positive that I have found my dress! Then they go and put a veil and tiara on me, and I didn't wantto move from in front of that mirror. I know now why people pay so much for wedding dresses, they are miracle workers! They take any flaw you have and hide it, and they enhance all your positive attributes! it made my vacation so fabulous, and I haven't been able to stop weding planning since! And to top it off, the dress was 2 sizes smaller than I wore in Heather's wedding in September, and it is made my the same designer, and it was still a bit big. Ahhh so Fabulous!
On another note (kind of back to where I started on in this post) I need to journal what I eat every day...this is the key for me, and I need to get in my exercise, which usually isn't a problem, if I want to be successful. To end on a fabulous quote that I read at the gym in Grande Cache....
WITHOUT A STRUGGLE THERE IS NO PROGRESS
January 09, 2006
Over all ready
I can't believe that my Christmas Vacation is over all ready...but I can say that although I didn't get to see everyone I wanted to see, I overall had a great trip home.
So now let’s get down to business....the reason for my blog...my battle with the bulge ;)
Well I started off on my 2 and a half week vacation saying that I would let myself eat whatever I wanted to eat on Christmas eve and Christmas day...cause those are the days my family has the yummiest foods around, and I figured what could two days worth of not counting points really hurt. After the 22 hour drive to home (stupid rush hours in Toronto and Montreal!) I soon realized that keeping track of points was not as straight forward as it was at home...or at least that is what I let my self believe, and so I did not count a single point after noon on my first day. To tell you the truth, I actually realize now that I have no idea where my tracker even is...somewhere in NB...lots of good it is doing me here.
To give my self some credit I did promise to at least be conscious of what I was eating. And I was, until Christmas Eve...and it didn’t stop till I got home 2 weeks later. WHY did I give my self permission to go all out for two days, knowing that I wouldn't be able to stop at that? I should have been strict...but it was Christmas and I thought I deserved a bit of a splurge. I can feel it though…creeping up on me...the truth will be revealed tomorrow at weigh in. I am expecting a 5 pound increase. I can deal with that...I have dealt with it before.
Today I am joining the gym here in Kincardine and I am getting back on track. No more slips for me, 55 to lose this year, 45 down last year (and I didn't even really start till April) so I think I can do it...HELLO 2006!
So now let’s get down to business....the reason for my blog...my battle with the bulge ;)
Well I started off on my 2 and a half week vacation saying that I would let myself eat whatever I wanted to eat on Christmas eve and Christmas day...cause those are the days my family has the yummiest foods around, and I figured what could two days worth of not counting points really hurt. After the 22 hour drive to home (stupid rush hours in Toronto and Montreal!) I soon realized that keeping track of points was not as straight forward as it was at home...or at least that is what I let my self believe, and so I did not count a single point after noon on my first day. To tell you the truth, I actually realize now that I have no idea where my tracker even is...somewhere in NB...lots of good it is doing me here.
To give my self some credit I did promise to at least be conscious of what I was eating. And I was, until Christmas Eve...and it didn’t stop till I got home 2 weeks later. WHY did I give my self permission to go all out for two days, knowing that I wouldn't be able to stop at that? I should have been strict...but it was Christmas and I thought I deserved a bit of a splurge. I can feel it though…creeping up on me...the truth will be revealed tomorrow at weigh in. I am expecting a 5 pound increase. I can deal with that...I have dealt with it before.
Today I am joining the gym here in Kincardine and I am getting back on track. No more slips for me, 55 to lose this year, 45 down last year (and I didn't even really start till April) so I think I can do it...HELLO 2006!
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